Defying The Odds

Has anyone ever told you that you could not shoot a wedding with a consumer camera?

How about someone telling you that you can only take events if you have f/2.8 zoom lenses?

Or what about having only the humble 50mm f/1.8. Does that mean you shouldn’t delve into serious photography?

We’ve all had those moments. Moments of self-doubt, perhaps due to peer pressure, or high expectations; mostly even self inflicted.

I learned recently from my own experience (and this isn’t even photographic) to defy convention, and to try to defy the odds that are stacked against you. In this case, it was my participation in the recent 10 km run as part of the KL Marathon. Now, those who know me personally will tell you that I look unfit, and that I would probably never survive this run without training. And yes, they are probably right. Heck, just put it this way: my regular exercise constitutes me sitting at the terminal and perhaps walking to the LRT station before and after work. Well, there’s the odd weekly badminton here and there, of which I’m literally the beginner of the group. Hence, my unfortunate partner at the time will have to do most of the heavy lifting. I don’t gym, and I no longer remember the last time I seriously jogged.

So yes, you are right, the odds are against me. Perhaps as a combination of pure laziness, or a lack of focus, or a multitude of distractions, I did not get around to doing any form of proper training for the run. Right up to this point, my family were already joking I would not make it past the 3 km mark. My friends, well, put simply, they didn’t want to put me down, so they said I’d be able to make it. But I knew from the tone of their voices they didn’t think I would even finish this race.

The amount of self doubt was starting to hit me as well. I tried to reassure myself, and even did some math. 10 km in a qualifying time of 1 hour 30 minutes. Okay, that equals 90 minutes. So it means I’ve to finish 1 km every 9 minutes. To break it down further, 100 m every 54 seconds. Hmmm… seems more than possible. After all, back in the day, I used to be able to run sprints at 15-16 seconds. So perhaps it will be possible. And then it occurred to me the night before, that I’d have to be up by 3+ am to make it to the location as road closures would mean a logistical nightmare. So I would be running on less than 3 hours of sleep in total from the evening prior. Oh joy, this was looking even more like an impossibility.

And so the moment drew close, and I headed off with some friends, did some basic warming up, and joined the huge masses that had signed up to join this 10 km run. Heart beat faster, nervous smiles, and soon, it was 7am, and the start of the run was flagged. So it began. I kept at a pace I was comfortable with, or thought I was. First kilometer passed, and then the second, no sign of slowing down yet. At this point I had already beat a family member’s prediction that I’d run out of steam at the 1 km mark. I reached the 3 km mark before I could not hold the initial pace and brisk-walked (so one family member did get it right), and mind you the way I do the latter is faster than most.

Got to the first water stop, and gulped down a cup (which took a while no thanks to the horrendous organization) but nevertheless, I continued onwards. The next 3 km was an exercise of regulating the brisk-walking to the uphill regions, and the jogs to the downhill portions.

At the 5 km mark I looked at the countdown I had set in my phone for 90 minutes. 45 minutes had passed. I had 45 minutes to cover the rest of the run. Basically, at this point, I felt like I just dug my own grave. I had no idea how I was to finish the remainder in exactly the same time I had finished the first half. But then it happened. I decided not to look at my phone anymore. And I just kept on going. For durations where my legs felt like giving way, I brisk-walked for a few minutes. I zoned out everyone else whom I was passing or was passing me, and just made it a conversation between me and my inner self. I let the music from my phone fill up my eardrums, and focused only on the steps I was taking one at a time.

Every now and then I would pick up the pace until I could not fight the mental strain anymore, and then brisk-walked. I did this interchanging of pace right up till the final kilometer. At that point, I told myself, that there is no way I am going to finish this race walking. Mustering whatever energy I had left, I started to run. Well, to most it would seem like just a jog, but the point is: I was determined that I was no longer going to walk. I held that pace. 100 m passed. The pain increased. I continued to hold pace. Another 100 m. I reminded myself of the Mount Kinabalu climb I did the year before. That climb was one where it was a severe case of mind over matter.

Flashback to one year ago:

The climb took me more than 5 hours on the Mesilau track, of which I carried my DSLR the entire journey. I also took another 3+ hours to get to summit, also with my trusty Canon 350D and 17-40mm lens around my neck, kept underneath my jacket. Ask anybody who’s done the climb and they’d tell you to carry a DSLR is crazy, because the longer you are up the hike, the heavier every SINGLE thing will weigh. Even a camera as light as a 350D in the DSLR world, will weigh like a few kilograms by the time you are nearing the summit. In more ways than one, the Kinabalu climb in itself was another exercise of defying odds and mind over matter. I decided 2 weeks before the actual date to fill up one of the available slots in the trip organized by the company. My training was about 3 hill hikes in the week leading up to the actual climb. And I remember when I was doing the last 2 hours heading up to the summit, my knees were giving way, and I could only take 20-30 steps at a time before having to sit down, lie back and curse. But I persevered. And even when the sun light started to come up, and I started to deflate, I carried on. And I made it in the end. Defied the odds, and made it to see the sun peak over the clouds, and just take in the glory that is the summit of Mount Kinabalu.

Trust me, until now, nothing beats that high of being on top of Southeast Asia, and also having beaten the odds, overcoming your own pains and mental blocks, and most importantly achieving what you thought was impossible.

The words of wisdom my dad passed to me then (he climbed it twice) was simple: “Go at your own pace, you’re not racing with anybody. Take your time.” And that mantra I kept for the KL 10 km run.

Return to present:

Another 100 m. The pain was starting to become unbearable. But I saw the finish line. Moments later, I passed it. And my time: about 1 hour and 15 minutes. I did it. The skinny chap whom no one gave a chance in finishing in the qualifying time, did it. And without training too. It was a moment to savor. And one to shut all the doubters up for some time to come.

So how does this apply to photography? Well it’s simple. The next time someone tells you that you can’t do something because your gear isn’t sufficient, defy them. The world’s greatest photographers of the past, had nothing but prime lenses, manual focus and FILM. And they came home with some of the world’s most renown images. Think Henri Cartier Bresson and Ansel Adams. In fact there are some prominent web writers on photography that claim that the best way to learn photography, is to pick up a film Leica, one prime lens, and shoot in black and white. Mind you, as pricey as that little beauty is, it only has manual focus, and none of the live-view AND large chimp-able LCDs AND awesome 51 AF points, etc.

The point here is to go back to basics. And it doesn’t get any more basic these days than a consumer DSLR and a 50mm f/1.8 lens.

Go out there and shoot the best images you can manage, and prove them wrong. At the very worst, you’ll learn how to appreciate the good gear when you finally do acquire it. But for now, with what you have, go out there and capture the best imagery you can muster. Trust me, if and when you do take back excellent photographs, you will surprise your peer. But most importantly, you will surprise yourself. And from there you will only improve as a photographer.

So the next time you ever doubt you can take a particular kind of photograph, or shoot a particular event taking place, just go out there and do it.

You will learn from it. Chances are you may even enjoy it. And even if you don’t, you’ll come back with lessons learned that no one could teach you by just telling you. And these, my friends, are the lessons that will stick with you. These are the ones, that make you a BETTER photographer.

PS: My next aim is to run the 10 km in under an hour, this time with ’some’ training. Anybody still think it is not possible? =P
Oh, and since we’re on defying odds photographically, what about shooting an event with consumer primes and no zooms? Impossible? =)